Identity crisis

It’s that time of year - we look back - evaluating how far we’ve come.  We take a look at what our hopes were for 2019. Perhaps you re-thought your career, a relationship, or finances.  Perhaps you are reflecting on how effective you have been in your purpose in 2019?

These are all great things to be doing.  Remember though that identity is paramount.  Purpose comes from identity.  It isn’t the other way around. Working first from the place of knowing who you are will get you firmly grounded - secure, based.

So who are you?  How do you tick?  What triggers you, what are your skills, passions and motivators? These comprise your identity?  There is little point in making a plan for 2020 – those new years resolutions - hoping for success and longevity – without a grounded identity of self.  Hard to plot a course when you don’t know your start point.

What many do to take control

I see this a lot.  It goes like this  ….. to take control of 2020:

  • First - decide what you really want and be determined to finally succeed
  • Second - accept and take responsibility for where you fell short, no blaming others or your past
  • Third - move forward, get out of your comfort zone, make the necessary changes, create a plan, act, and be willing to learn
  • Finally – be expectant of success (the true meaning of hope is being positively expectant!) stay focused, determined. Review limiting mindsets and beliefs, visualize success, stay motivated,  surround yourself with the right people.

These are all important, yes – but – no, not yet!

Understanding yourself must come first

This is where to start - understand how you are wired, what is the essence of you.  What is not you and simply a reflection of others or you pleasing others.  Who are you truly when you peel off your life circumstances or past.  Know yourself at your core, at your essence, as you were created to be.

Our emotions cloud these truths.  Feelings frequently do not reflect reality (truth).

You can feel like collapsing but still be fighting.  You can feel like the victim and be the victor.  You can feel limited but still not have exhausted all that is inside of you.  You cannot define yourself by how you feel. Your feelings cannot be trusted.  Your emotions will lie to you. Why?  Because your feelings are a combination of your current experiences, they are built up from your history. They are a response to what happened not what’s about to happen.

Do not be distracted by a fury of planning and goal setting without having found the peaceful and non-emotionally driven place to hone in on your identity. Identity is first. The you, your core and essence.  This is the foundation needed from which to launch into and succeed with your purpose for 2020.

Angela Miccio-Harris


Angela is a life coach which means she disciples, teaches, mentors individuals to liberation